He refused to tell her, but after a few more minutes of relentless badgering he gave in and told the story of a boy who was, at the time, in his sixth form class and who for whatever reason loved microwaves and was known for these odd antics. But never quite on this level. The boy had heard the explanation of the experiment and really wanted to see it in action so decided to do it at home. But he didn’t do something that would have contained the plasma lightning thing and so managed to burn his kitchen completely to the ground, even emailed the teacher photos for proof which we were shown. The science teachers who taught at the comically deprioritised girls’ site originally thought that this decree was a joke because the building that housed the science block shared a lower floor with half of the junior school and the electricity was known to shut off if more than two kettles were heated at once. It was not a joke and instead an absolute nightmare until the year I left.

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